A year and a journey

It’s almost been a year since I started writing my blog. A journey is what I had embarked upon and a journey is what I have experienced.  

After having a conversation with a dear friend, sharing topics with each other on relationships, personal growth and general life topics, he said to me, “April, you’ve come a long way, your journey in the last year has been a tough road, you've always remained upbeat regardless what has been throw your direction”

Back in June 2012, I can say I took the painting of my life, threw it out the window and started over. Okay, maybe not start over completely, but took a deeper look at who I was.  Don’t get me wrong, I have loved and embraced my life, every aspect, every challenge, every happy moment, every disappointment. I knew I wanted more out of this life, but I also knew there was some tweaking that needed to be done and I love change. So, what better way than to make those changes happen and open new doors.

Before I talk about my journey over the past year, I first have to touch on my racing. I get asked quite a bit, how the mountain bike racing is going. Without giving a million excuses, it has not gone as I would have hoped for. I started my race season with a high, I felt great and ready to achieve some podiums for the season. But....my body has had something else in mind. My second race went great, and although I was not 1, 2 or 3, I still felt like I did a great job. But, this is where it all starts to fall apart. My 3rd race was the hill climb in Winter Park, I’m not a fan of this race, but I did it regardless, yeah my strong suit is not climbing either, so it was okay, but not a great performance. The next race was the Super Loop at Winter Park. Two days before the race I drove my car into the garage with my bike on top. I manage to destroy my bike frame as well as damage my car. The entire roof rack was ripped off the car. Now for those of you out there who sadly have done this, you know this sucks! There is no better way of putting it. I was completely at a lost. The bike was brand new, just purchased 3 months prior. So, I was scrambling to figure out what I was going to do, knowing I had a race two days ahead of me. I was fortunate enough to have called the bike shop where I purchased the last bike and learned that they has the same exact bike in the shop.

I wasted no time to get there to purchase the bike. Unfortunately, lesson learned on my race day, the bike needed some tuning. So for my 4th race, 5 minutes into my race, the chain drops when I am trying to shift. I had a wonderful gentleman help me, but we knew that the fix may not last the entire race. Once the chain was put back on, I started climbing, shifted gears and yes it dropped again. This continued another 3 times. At this point, I knew my race was over. It took everything I had not to sit on the bike and cry. For the first time ever, I DNF a race. I was disappointed, I felt like I let my team down, this was hard for me to swallow.

It turns out that the bike needed work, the rear hanger was slightly bent and the front derailleur was too high. Bike was repaired in time for my next race, which is the point to point in Winter Park. Let’s just say, epic fail. No power in my legs, provided for a ride instead of a race. My body has not been in the game for a bit now. I have had more low days physically than up days. My mind wants to go and my legs say no.

This has been a frustrating aspect for me. I am not one that gives up easily, but my body has completely gone in a direction I can’t ignore.

I was able to get on my bike and do two fun rides, one of which I happened to meet a fellow rider who we had raced together earlier this season. It was great cause her and I were able to exchange how riding/racing was going and we both shared the same feelings of where we were with it. We rode a bit before I turned around to head back to Denver from Snowmass. I had a good ride planned for the next day and wanted to rest up some. This ride was like the old April was back. I felt great, my legs felt much better than they had in weeks and I was encouraged. So, not to get too excited about the way I was feeling I still forced myself to take a few days off from any exercise.

So, with another race approaching, I wish I could say I am excited about it, but my desire to get on the bike is less than that driving force I have experienced in the past. I am much more pleased with my last race (last weekend), although I didn’t podium, I felt much stronger, faster and overall happier with my performance. The course was long and challenging, my last 4 miles of the race, I took a digger over the handlebars, I don’t remember how I did it, but just that I got back on and kept pedaling. This race, my class was small, very small, only 4 girls in my age group. I placed 4th, but having felt better on my bike than I had in weeks was my success story of this race and reminded of how grateful I was for the experience.

Moving onto the last year.....

My reflection over the past year comes with many accomplishes, moments of sorrow and moments of celebrations. I lost my best friend Frosty in September. The little guy fought a disease his entire life and although I would have loved to have him forever, we had an amazing 12 years. The one thing I can say about him was the imprint he left, his ability to love anything and everyone. His kindness although a dog, spoke volumes to my heart. I am reminded to show that same kindness with people in my life. I continue to work on this area and am very grateful for having the opportunity to share and experience 12 years with him.

The next major event came a month after losing Frosty. I learned that the company I was working for had plans to lay me off. This was such a hard thing to swallow, I took this personally. Learning later that it was never about me, but actually something that needed to happen long before. Funny how we are forced into a situation, even if we don’t want to deal with it. It took 3 months of interviewing and perseverance, but I was very fortunate to had been given an offer with a small growing company. I started February 4th of this year and we are moving in a direction we had all hoped for. Being new to this industry has quite honestly been so rewarding in so many ways. I am learning new stuff every day, things I never imagine. It’s exciting to be part of something so small, knowing that it can become something so big. I extend my gratitude to my company for allowing me this experience.

I also shared some of my dating experiences with you on this blog. These opportunities have been something I look back at and say, “I learned something from these experiences”. I learned to really listen to someone, to respect them, be aware of what they really want, to be open to new experiences, to be really involved, instead of just there. Even though we were not meant to be life partners I've really took a deeper path to understand those relationships. Relationships are valuable to me. I do truly wish the best for each person who's path I cross or theirs mine. Of some those dates I was on, a few of those guys became good friends, one of them, we actually have a business relationship with each other, so I am reminded that although it didn’t turn out as a love match, it turned out to be a fulfilling relationship in a different respect. How could I have asked for anything differently? I’m also reminded that, even though I date someone and it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t mean that I don’t have a great friend who I may want to introduce that person too. I truly believe in love and that every person deserves a golden opportunity, if I can be of assistance in that area, that will always fill my heart with happiness.

When I chose to take a different beat and path with my life, people asked why, my reasoning may not be one everyone can understand, but I can truly say that I desired more out of this so interesting thing called “life”. What I learned is this. “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” Babe Ruth. We must keep swinging that bat, turning that pedal, or running just a bit further. We will eventually hit that home run, finish that ride or run into our destination.

I can happily say that I am more aware of that now than I was ever in the past. So, my journey in the last year has meant something more to me than I could honestly express. I chose to hire a life shaping coach, someone that could help guide me in utilizing my own tools, someone that gave me the tools to step out of my box and get real with myself. I know this may all sound like rubbish to some and that’s okay. I’ve reflected while writing this blog and looked back on the last year and can be quite happy with my achievements within.

As KCB and I have spoken many times on the phone, there is one comment that he says to me that has really stuck with me over time, “I love that you speak your truth April”, yes, I do, I try. I still am working on the delivery of it all, I know I may not always be successful every single time, but what I do know is I will continue to improve no matter what obstacle, challenge or bike accident (laugh with me).  For this I can pat myself on the back and say well done. If anything, I have taken away in the last year is that, I fully have come to love the person I am, to be grateful for every experience, every person I meet and embrace life no matter how fast or slow it may get, no matter how crazy the climb may be or how scary the downhill is. EMBRACE IT! It only took 39 years but, I can smile in the mirror and look at that individual and say “WOW, I REALLY DO LOVE YOU AND YOU DESERVE ONLY THE BEST”. Do it, I guarantee, that no one loves you like the person in the mirror.

So a year and its been a amazing journey, I’ve had moments of tears, moments of sadness, but so many moments of happiness, accomplishments and laughter! I continue to grow and wake up every morning filled with gratitude for the people in my life, family, friends and pets.

As I bring a close to this writing, I send much love and cheer to everyone!

Music is always something I love sharing... a few faves of mine!

Better, but not great!

I was born with sports in my blood, my parents put skates on me at the young age of 4. I figure skated for many years to come, most of those years at a very competitive level. So, early in my childhood I was driven to be my best. That best has changed over the years as I have grown and also with life changes that we all experience.

If you would have asked me when I was a teenager if I saw myself mountain biking, I would have said no. I wanted to be a professional dancer and singer. But, I was not fortunate enough to have a singing voice, I did get the dancing moves and can still break it down today, although I think my niece thinks differently.

I was first introduced to mountain biking by yes, you guessed it a BOY. Yes,  I was dating a guy who was a mountain biker and introduced me to it summer of 1994. I am the fortunate one to be able to say that Green Mountain was one of my first rides and I could tell you I never ran into another mountain biker, usually runners and we mountain bikers got some funny looks back than. I wasn’t a serious biker by any means, I did it for pure recreational purposes. But, I did enjoy riding my bike, going to some beautiful places and smelling the woods behind every pedal stroke.

I biked for 6-7 years before taking time off the bike and sliding into a  somewhat normal life. I say normal, cause if you ride a bike, or do any sport for the enjoyment of pain well, you might not be normal. During that time I was married and the other person was not an outdoor person such as myself. But, one day I saw someone on TV and he reminded me how much I loved biking. So, off to the bike store I went where I purchased my first ever road bike. I actually remember my first road ride. I was by myself, rode out north up towards Boulder. I got on the bike and was so excited, I think you could see my smile all the way in Wyoming. I thought wow this is fun, but man I’m out of shape. I looked down to discover that I had only ridden 10 miles. Oh dear AP, you have some work to do.

After the excitement of getting back on a bike I was so thrilled, but something was missing, what was it, I had a new road bike, I had my old mountain bike....oh wait, yeah, old mountain bike, I wonder what it would feel like to get on that again. So, out I pulled my old steel machine and dropped her off at the bike shop for some fine tuning. I was so excited to pick her up and get those wheels rolling on some singletrack. Excited was just it, until I got on a mountain bike trail that had some elevation gain. Oh my what have I gotten myself into, this hurts.

Sadly, my marriage ended shortly after, I found myself single again and all I had were my bikes. Soon after my separation I had met another mountain bike guy, he asked me if I wanted to join him for a ride up at Lair O Bear. I said sure of course, not knowing what I was getting myself into and having no idea what was ahead of me. We arrived at the trailhead and it had been raining, eager to give this a go, we got the bikes rolling. Now, this individual was an elite rider, I had no idea what I was in for. Being kind and supportive he encouraged me all the way up. Huffing and holding back tears of pain, I managed to make it half way up. I had no more juju, no more strength, no more power to pedal the bike uphill. This was a whole new world of cycling, that I had walked upon. Although, I cried and wanted to die, I didn’t give up. I continued to ride my road bike and upgraded the mountain bike. This was a new beginning for me and my biking years to come.

For years, I rode and rode and continued to get stronger and faster and after having a medical condition finally answered, I was on a new better and stronger cycling path.

Finally there came a time where I wanted to actually race my bike, which leads me up to this blog today. I’ve always had that competitive nature about myself, I raced on a team a few years ago and did okay middle of the pack most of the time. Actually I think each race I completed I was in 5th place. After that season of racing, I just wanted to ride my bike. To get out there and explore more trails, more amazing singletrack that takes you as far out as possible. I did just that, I have been to some beautiful places on my bike in multiple states. So when it came a time for me to decide if I was ever going to race again..well it wasn’t a hard decision for me to make.

This year I am so grateful to be racing with an elite team of racers. They are fast and I could only hope to be as fast as some of my fellow racers. But, racing is something different for each person and for me, it is proof that I had worked hard over the past few years to be where I am today. So, I started my race season off with Battle of the Bear, this race was fast and exciting and coming in 3rd place for my first race, meant I was off to a good start. My second race was June 2nd, BetiBikeBash is the name of the race, this is an great event, a race for women and only women. I had a new bike this year, I felt great coming into this race and was ready to take my next podium. But... I was not the dog in this race, but rather the fire hydrant and was handle some humble pie. Even having improved my time from last year to present year, I was unable to catch the fastness that was ahead of me. 2012 my time was 1:00:31.6 and this years time was 52:21.1, an improvement but just not enough to make it happen, being 3 minutes off the first place winner made me realize that I had to dig deeper to be faster.

As always I enjoyed the race, but was reminded just how much faster the girls I ride/race with are. I’ll continue to get out there and dig to my inner fastness for the next race, which is 5 miles uphill. Anyone that knows me well, knows I’m not a fan of tons of climbing,  but I’ll do what I can to make this happen with a performance I know I can be proud of.

So, as we approach the weekend and a warm weekend it will be, I wish everyone a wonderful weekend, playing bikes, having fun with friends and I know I am due for a beer.

My song... hmmm this one was hard this time cause I was feeling a bit ho-hum from my racing performance, but I always try to find the best part of a situation and rise above it! I remember this song from high school, there was a performance that came to our school and they played this song as an opening act. This song sums it up for me today.

Much love to all my people and readers! May you have a wonderful weekend and until next time. Peace out! 

Take what you can get!

Yes, but never settle for less. This is what a friend said to me recently. Wise words maybe? I haven’t written lately cause I really didn’t have much to share or talk about, this blog although people read it, is really a diary of self. Something I come back to months later and re-read and look back and weigh in on what changes and growth I have accomplished.

Last year I went through so much change and afterwards I was exhausted by it all. My brain was about to explode with change and knowledge. I shared my dating experiences, my heartache, disappointments, moments of happiness with computer and all the readers who took it upon themselves to take the time to read. By February I was wiped out from it all. So, when I got the opportunity to do a bit of travel I jumped right on it. In a matter of 3 weeks, I had been to Atlanta, Puerto Rico and Utah. Some of that was relaxation and some of that was for work. In the middle of that, I started seeing someone. New job, training for race season, and throw a male counterpart into that mix, it eats up some time.

Now, I am very grateful for the new job and definitely excited about my race season as I am off to a good start. But, dating hasn’t been my strong suit in oh let's say 8 years. In that 8 years, I dated someone for 2 years, who is now recently married, than a 3 year relationship that was nothing short of a disaster, but that was not enough for me I guess, when I took another journey with someone for it to only end 7 months later. So, given my track record, I was all but ready to say “to hell with this relationship aspect of my life” maybe I am meant to be alone for the rest of my life, maybe I’ll be sitting in a nursing home or my home (if I am lucky and not broken from years of biking) wondering why it was so hard to find that ONE person, who I can call my best friend, who I run across the world with, who shared with me my great moments, my NOT so great moments, etc. I mean lets get serious here for a second, it crosses my mind, not all the time, but it does happen, hell I’m human and I don’t feel bad thinking about it for one second. It’s my reality and the consistent reminder of men saying “Now, why hasn’t some lucky guy snatched you up yet?” HELL I don’t know, I’m just waiting for him to get off the toilet, or get back from Whole Foods, or stop his world of travels long enough to notice me.

Ha ha it's all funny, but for us almost 40 somethings single ladies, it’s nothing short of funny. People say the best things to us single people, love will come when you least expect it, just do the things you enjoy and you never know what may happen, go live your life. Yes, I have heard it all and you know what I have done exactly that. I have been living my life, a life that I am happy to call mine. I have wonderful friends, family, experiences and adventures. So, when I started seeing this person with it all came the baggage, I thought to myself oh no April, you’re going down that same path again. Hell I had someone who I valued their opinion tell me their point of view (actually after processing it all, realized this was their judgment of someone they have never even met), which not positive what so ever. I remember that night, I was so upset with what this person said, that I tried to work out my frustrations by hitting the gym and that didn’t help. UGH, was this for a reason? I was thinking about it too much, was this person right, wrong, am I headed down the path of dating disaster?

Well if you ask that person, yes it was for a reason, but the  reason was very different than what they were pointing out, at least that is my conclusion.  It all came back to “Don’t Take Anything Personally, Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering”. BUT.....is this my baggage, their baggage, everyone’s baggage? OH MY, can you hear the freight train moving through again?

Let’s get to this person, he has been nothing short of wonderful to me, in all essence it’s been a pretty simple relationship, we have great conversations, we can spend the entire day working a few feet from each other and get along nicely, we can be in the car for hours and play music trivia, which I will say he is the one to beat. We can run together, okay, he runs and I chase him. We share many of the same principals, beliefs and goals. I miss him when he is away and excited when we get to spend time together.

Sounds good right, yes, I think so too, but this relationship was was faced with rumors, judgments and associations and not from me though or him, but about him with others. People that don’t even know him all that well and others that have developed their own perspective. So, my excitement was cut short, by all these thoughts and feelings.  I had to ask myself what was I getting into, I had to HAVE those conservations with him that I never really thought I would have, when you are getting to know a person. Finally when I said, I hear others, but my heart wants to give this a go and take a risk for love, even if that might include heartbreak and disappointment.

See, here is the thing, if you don’t take any risks, you could be left standing there one day, wondering. I have chosen to forget the wondering part and find out. I know that I am cared for in many ways, I get that, I really do. But, love is letting go of fear and my goal to let go of the fear that has controlled so much of my life, I have lived a safe life, of which I have become quite accustomed too. If the person whomever I am with, doesn’t see the amazing package they are getting I can’t change that, nor can I force them to see it. To be here and say that, well leaves me feeling like I have taken something away from the last year. So, yes, I will continue to jump in to the ends of this relationship to explore what is to come and take that risk, big or small I will take what I can get! Life is short and giving up one more moment to fear is not on my agenda.

Finally, I am going to finish this blog off with my accomplishment last Sunday. I’m racing this season and my first race was last Sunday. I had gotten on the bike Saturday to pre-ride the course and well I felt not inspired and was even concerned that my race would be less than epic for my first race. I got to bed early Saturday night, got up Sunday morning, stopped to pick up some breakfast and head out to the race course. I met my team and we all prepared and encouraged each other for our race to come. Being my first race, I opted for 20 miles instead of 60 or 30 miles. Plus, 20 miles for me on the mountain bike race speed seems to be just fitting enough. My class was the last class to go out, I always size up the ladies whom I am racing with, some tiny, thin cyclist, me somewhere in between. My usual practice for racing, I place myself on the back line, but something in me today, said push ahead to the front, so I got on the starting line. As we waited to start I could feel my blood start to pump, my heart in my throat and oh GOD, I HATE THIS PART!!! I always come out of the gate strong, but then die 5 minutes into a race. So, I had to hold back just a tiny bit so I didn’t lose all my speed or strength. As the announcer said “GO” I was filled with the rush of adrenaline. So off I went, I never looked back until the second lap. As I cross into my second lap, I and the girl who’s wheels I was on the whole time during our first lap, both look back and realize its just her and I. We pull back enough to recover and grab some water. She commented on me pushing her and that she was ready to die, we laugh and pushed forward for our second lap.

I had jumped ahead of her the second lap and she rode my back wheel for half the course, once we got to double track she passed me like the wind, I did everything I could to stay up with her, but she dropped me the last quarter of our lap. I knew I wasn’t far behind her and I didn’t want to lose my placement and at this time I had no idea what placement I had. So, I pedalled as fast as I could the rest of the course which was flat and fast. I crossed over the finished line and took a few moments to catch my breath and my legs. HOLY HELL, I felt that acid flowing through them like never before.

I didn’t even care what placement I got, I was so excited about my performance and the riding experience with Tabitha that I just smiled, we exchanged hugs for a job well done and talked about our experience with each other. I returned to my car to retrieve dog and put my bike up and grab a change of clothes. When I returned back to the race area to chat with my team, congratulate them on their races, I walked over to the results stand. I looked for my cateogory and saw my name, I looked to the left to see my placement. I was at first...wait is that right??? HELLZ YEAH IT IS. 3rd baby. I’ll take that to Tabitha 2nd place. I’ll take what I can get!

I was by far very pleased with my performance. The last couple of years keeping up with MC on her bike, well it’s paid off. So thanks MC, you’ve created a mean machine on the bike.

Happy weekend all and enjoy the sun, bikes, family, friends, races.

Much love to you all, this song describes my race completely. I felt every beat and pulse during that race!

Happy birthday to me!

Funny how a week can change so much. I was going to post a blog last week, but I didn’t, I Iet it sit there and this week when I went to go back and read what I wrote and well...I trashed it.  It’s funny how that happens with ones own writing. Believe me it happens more often than not.

Instead I am celebrating my life, my 39 years on this beautiful place called life. When I look back at my years as a young girl, teenager, young women and soon to be approaching the great 40’s (one more year) I am very grateful for my life, the rough times, the good times, the times of sorrow, the times of complete joy, every moment, every breath I take I am grateful for. I’m grateful for my health, my fitness levels, my ability to ride my bike, run, hike and snowboard. Taking a walk on the beach, feeling the sand in between my toes, smelling the fresh pine trees all while I am coming down the trail on my bike. Yes, I am grateful for it all.

The last year for me has been a self reflection in many ways, I’ve striped myself naked and no not in that sense, but yes, pulled the many layers of self off to start over in my life, to start new beginnings. To reach that self fulfillment, to reach my ultimate high. Even though the last year has been tough for me at times, I continue to be grateful for all I have and want to thank each person in my life. My celebration of my life is celebrating with all the people who mean so much to me, my family, my friends and of course riding my bike.

So, although I didn’t blog about the most recent events in my life, I have chosen to keep some of those things close to my heart, If I learned anything in the past year, it is my gratitude for everything in this life of which I get to live and experience. Good or bad, I am so grateful and will continue to shine on!

Happy Birthday to me (April 12th) and yes, my birthday wouldn't be AP’s birthday day without yes, you guessed it, a birthday song. I had to pick one of the top playing songs of April 1974. Here we go and as a gift to you all, my MOST favorite song to follow.

Much love to you all!

Is it broken?......

I have always thought of myself as an upbeat person, happy, positive, driven and always encouraging, but maybe that button is broken?

I started writing this blog last week after some personal events took place. I haven’t shared that with anyone except 2 people. Yes, two whole people. It’s nothing major, but it was enough to shake me a bit and leave me feeling a bit down for a few days and quite stressed. Than I remembered what Don Miguel Ruiz wrote on his 4 Agreements and everything I have learned from Leianne.

First, find my clear space and breathe. I had just returned from a beautiful trip in Puerto Rico. I had so much to be grateful for, the company was amazing and quite surprising in many ways. But, more about that later. Remembering everything I have learned in the past year, the time I spent to make that all happen and guess what no one did it, I did it all by myself and gosh darn it, I have something to be happy about.

After getting back to my good space, everything changed and what I was going to write about, didn’t seem valid at this point.

I know I have mentioned Don Miguel Ruiz book before. But, really EVERYONE should read it. I will not let negativity creep into my life. I worked too hard to let that happen. I will not let what another has said to me, get to me. This is one of the Four Agreements “Don’t Take Anything Personally.  Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering”.

Wow, that gives me chills just reading it again, but a good refresher, cause I think we all forget this in our daily lives. I know I do, and I feel I am pretty aware of myself and surroundings and events that take place.

So, why is this all a big deal? A tragic event took place last week with one of my family members. Out of respect for my family I will not go into details, but it was very sad and very difficult for those closest to the situation. True to form, my family got caught up in some “family drama” and yes, I was one of those individuals who was involved. The outcome although heart -breaking for me, may well be the best course of action for me and my life and future. I’ve been the fixer in a lot of my relationships, family, friends, professional life. For so long, I would do whatever possible to make sure someone is happy, that everything is okay, but all along forgetting the most important person and that is myself.

After time spent thinking of the situation and reading back to myself that it’s not about me, I was able to let go of all that drama. Everyone hits a rough patch in their lives from time to time, but consistently being negative and never finding happiness in anything, well all I can say is I’ve chosen not to be a part of that! If a person is on a path of self destruction, the only person that can help them is THEM! Yes, we as family and friends can offer support and be caring, but at what point does one draw the line in the sand? The saying goes, if you keep failing at something, the only common denominator is you! Well for this particular situation I know where I have drawn my line and its quite clear.

When I took the journey for change in my life last year, I can say that the things I have learned are invaluable and I feel completely whole as a person and have never been happier. I chose how I deal with people and the situations and around me. Although I may slip and fall at times, I always get back up, brush the dirt off my knees and move full force ahead. Being that I like to fix situations, whether that be my bike, stuff around my house, relationships in turmoil, the the most important person you can care for is you. Once you are able to do that, than everything else falls into line. This I can say has and continues to happen for me.

I am completely grateful for my journey and when I look back, I can say that my journey has been quite amazing in so many ways. I smile daily.

I’ve embarked on a new journey and I can say with a whole heart, that NO, it’s not broken. My blogging  in many ways is therapeutic and I continue to receive many amazing compliments as to my blog. As to each one Thank You!

This Saturday is my mother’s birthday and I want to take this moment to tell her that I love you mother and thank you for giving me life. I hope your day is relaxing and wonderful!

True to form, no blog of my is complete without leaving you all a song. I don’t believe I have yet to share one of my favorite bands, so enjoy and have a wonderful weekend and remember you are precious, yes you!

Way overdue posting!

Yes, I am way overdue on my writings for my blog. I have pretty much put it to the side the last month or so. But, all for good reason.

As most of you know I took a new job that started in February and wow is all I can say. Yes, I am working from home, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been any busier with work. I’ve learned a couple of things since working from home. Yes, I can crawl out of bed and take a few steps into my office within 5 mins, but I learned that having a routine is best suited for me. I need to get up, make breakfast, turn the computer on and get my mind prepared for my day.

Second item I have taken away, is I love working from home, no girl drama, the kind of drama where you are left wondering if you are back in highschool again. No jealousy, no stepping on anyone’s toes, well maybe my own, no politics. Just days looking out my office window (my living room window), thinking to myself, why did I ever sign up for any of that? Corporate American I can officially say I don't miss you. I like working for small business.

I am very grateful to be working for the company that I am. Being the only girl with a few good men is much more my style. No drama and no my feelings don’t get hurt if they offer up suggestions, ideas on improvement. I can actually say the only stressful part of my job is when the phone rings and its 4 calls at once. Everyone helps each other out and the meaning of team has really come full circle with this new job. I am very happy that this journey that I was lead upon has taken the path that it did.

So onward and upward is my new motto. With this new path of employment, I've find myself with the ability to travel a bit too.

I remember I made a statement at the beginning of the year, that I needed to get to the beach. Well, that statement has become a reality for me. A friend asked me if I wanted to join him in Puerto Rico for few days and well, I would be quite crazy to say no to that offer. So, I leave tomorrow for a much awaited trip to a tropical paradise. I am so excited I can hardly stand myself! Then I come home for yes, 8 hours and make my way back to DIA for a 3-day trip to St. George for a work conference.

Once I get back, I will be putting many hours in on the bike, my first race is the 20th of April, I’m confident I will be ready, but, I will need to put in some hard time on the bike. I’ve been keeping to my running schedule since darkness falls early during the week and I still work 8-5 job. I’ve been running before work or after, so I know my fitness by April will be where I want it to be. Once I get home from my work trip. It’s all bike! Yes, I am writing this to myself, this is my promise to self. Plus, I will have me day light time now.

I can say I have learned a lot from training in the past year. For me, I learned that running is my core training. It keeps me strong for the bike season, I can pedal faster and longer. I see my team mates putting in long long hours on the bike now and I have to give them mad props, I know myself too well, to know that by June I would be burnt out. Also, racing for me has to be fun, no bueno if no fun. I will always enjoy a beer after a race, ride, etc It’s all about having a great time for me.

So as I look back on the last 3, 6 or 12 months, my life has brought many great changes, the journey has been rewarding even though I had days where I question that reward. I am looking forward to a 5-day trip to Puerto Rico and yes I will be working 3 of those 5 days, but the idea I can work and feel the ocean breeze upon my skin sounds quite amazing.

So farewell and until next week....

As usual I have chosen a song, this is quite fitting for my little adventure away.

Much love all!

Jobs, bikes and oh maybe

I know it’s been a few weeks since my last blog. Most of you know that my life has taken a change, an exciting new change. Yes, after 5 years working for Liberty, I gave my notice in mid-January and my last day was the 31st.

I am preparing for my short trip to Phoenix for 3 days of training with my new boss. He emailed me on Thursday and said. “Oh by the way, it’s casual wear with us, put those business clothes in storage.” HELLZ yeah, although admittedly I stopped getting dressed up for Liberty back in October last year. I feel like the big elephant has left the room and I can finally breathe. What did I learn from all this, one might ask? I learned A LOT!

I learn that when you stop putting your heart into something you love and you try to regain it back, and you can't, your done. I was done with Liberty 2 years ago. I was comfortable, I had a solid paycheck, benefits, etc. But, I was not climbing the ladder, I was not gaining any momentum. I was just there! 

I also learned that keeping my eggs for me and not giving them away, was huge. I put so much stalk into my position that I lost sight of what really made me happy, when doing this it had huge consequences for me once I learned I was going to be laid-off.  A dear friend, said to me back in October, he said, April I never go into work thinking I am somebody, I’m just a number, number 56437. Then when something goes down, you’re not attached to it. You don’t give them the ability to take your balls out of your basket.

Liberty started as a small company, mostly family members, college friends. It grew quickly in a short amount of time and I grew with it. I will take what I have learned and apply it to my new company. I worked hard and I come away with such an achievement of success along with gratitude. Every experience in our lives is a journey and although I fought this journey in the beginning, I quickly learned why and what was to come.

So, thanks for all the support to a few you, you know who you are, you listened, encouraged and help me down the path.

As for my personal life, I was so busy with finishing up the job at Liberty and quite exhausted, that I put everything secondary. Chandler my roommate moved out. Although I will miss him, have to say best roommate EVER, I converted his room into my now new office space. I’ve really enjoyed having my home completely back to myself.

Mountain biking, I have been training, but January was a slow start for me, so I am ready to go February. I rode both days this weekend and even though I will be Phoenix for 3 days, I will get in some running, 75 degree temps are well PERFECT. I wish I had time to ride my bike, but I will be training, so running will have to take place for a few days. Than once I am back, I will be up and at them. Oh I did purchase a new bike. OH YES! So excited, it will be here first week of March. She is HOT, HOT, HOT!

As for everything else, I know what you all are thinking...Men... Yeah well, after my blogging of my dates last fall, I took a break from dating for December and January. I have been on a few dates and all of them were much better than the dates last year. MUCH! I don’t have any crazy stories, no stinky drunk men, no “I might have time to date” men, nope very normal gentlemen. Which is very refreshing. So all I can say is stay tune. I’ll update accordingly.

Lastly, I am full of gratitude to all my family, friends and readers. It’s great to hear from people that they miss my blogs and enjoyed hearing about my journey. All I can say is, I’m real, you get me completely.

I will be resuming my blogs weekly again and looking forward to it. 

Here is my new toy. Like I said HOT! 

As always, my blog is no blog without music.

This song, is about the journey, a journey richly consumed in my work. Well that is what it means to me. A slower song for AP, but a beautiful song none the less.

My Jibber

I started writing this a few weeks ago, I was going to post it before Christmas and then I opted out of posting it. I left what I wrote and came back to this and thought, yeah, this is part of my story. This is part of that journey I went through in 2012. I was not a big fan of 2012 at all! Nope,  but I will remember the good that came from that year, the experiences I felt and dealt with.

One of the highlights of 2012 was taking it upon myself for self improvement, self exploring in all senses. I really can say I have become a different person. Happier in so many ways, living life, feeling, and sensing each moment I am grateful to experience, so as I continue to write for this week’s blog here is my jibber.

I have to say I am exhausted and could use some real R&R. I pray that it’s coming! Between working full-time, my normal day job, working up at Loveland Ski resort, which is completely rewarding and I love and fully enjoy and then yes, another part time job in the evenings. Lack of sleep is something that is becoming my norm.
Why so many jobs? For those of you that don’t know, I took a demotion in October 2012, after finding out that I was actually going to be laid-off. I’ve been told so many different things, as for the reasoning. The reasoning doesn’t matter to me at this moment in my life, what I learned from that dreaded day in October was I’m keeping my own damn eggs for myself and not giving my power away to corporate America.

If you have read my blog, than this all makes sense now. I’ve been working for the same company over 5 years and when I found out that I was being let go, well saying my world came crashing down was putting it lightly. I worked, sweated, and gave everything I had to this company. I was sad to say the least, but....after feeling that bottom of the pit, I chose TO RISE ABOVE IT ALL!

This change allowed me to make some changes in my life, all for the better and gave me a brighter outlook on 2013. I am very hopeful that all my work over the last couple of months pays off. It’s no secret that my intention of staying where I currently am was not my goal. I feel I have completed what I was there for and the time to move forward. I have learned that being in a place of complantency is just not good enough for me. Nope, I want and desire more in my life and for that I will do more and be more. I am April and that is the one thing I know for sure. This girl is driven and fights to the death!

As the 2012 year wrapped up, I am happy to announce that I was selected to be on a race team for 2013 mountain season. I am super excited about racing for 2013, the past few years I have put many miles on my mountain bike and explored many new places and pushed myself beyond the limits on some of these rides. Now is the time to put all that work together and make it happen for my race season. I will train, train and train to make this happen. Also, just this week I accepted a new position with a software company that provides services to the State of Utah and their Attorneys for Electronic filing. The best part of this job is I will be working with a small fantastic group of men of whom I have developed a great professional relationship with. I am eager to finally put everything I have learned over the past 12 years in the legal profession and apply it to this new position. One of the perks is I get to work from home. I really wanted this and it has now become my reality. I am quite pleased to say the least. As for the other jobs, I had to make a hard decision to give up my position at Loveland, with mountain bike training and racing, I have to put my energies where they are needed. As for the other part-time job, I can do it whenever so, I will keep it for extra mountain biking money :) I need a new bike, shoes, helmet, camelbak, yeah baby, let’s go shopping.

Farewell 2012 and HELLO 2013. I am so happy to see you and what is all to come.

I apologize for not writing over the past few weeks, but now you can understand my reasoning.

Much love.....

I can’t tell you why exactly but I love this song. So here you go