Is it broken?......

I have always thought of myself as an upbeat person, happy, positive, driven and always encouraging, but maybe that button is broken?

I started writing this blog last week after some personal events took place. I haven’t shared that with anyone except 2 people. Yes, two whole people. It’s nothing major, but it was enough to shake me a bit and leave me feeling a bit down for a few days and quite stressed. Than I remembered what Don Miguel Ruiz wrote on his 4 Agreements and everything I have learned from Leianne.

First, find my clear space and breathe. I had just returned from a beautiful trip in Puerto Rico. I had so much to be grateful for, the company was amazing and quite surprising in many ways. But, more about that later. Remembering everything I have learned in the past year, the time I spent to make that all happen and guess what no one did it, I did it all by myself and gosh darn it, I have something to be happy about.

After getting back to my good space, everything changed and what I was going to write about, didn’t seem valid at this point.

I know I have mentioned Don Miguel Ruiz book before. But, really EVERYONE should read it. I will not let negativity creep into my life. I worked too hard to let that happen. I will not let what another has said to me, get to me. This is one of the Four Agreements “Don’t Take Anything Personally.  Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering”.

Wow, that gives me chills just reading it again, but a good refresher, cause I think we all forget this in our daily lives. I know I do, and I feel I am pretty aware of myself and surroundings and events that take place.

So, why is this all a big deal? A tragic event took place last week with one of my family members. Out of respect for my family I will not go into details, but it was very sad and very difficult for those closest to the situation. True to form, my family got caught up in some “family drama” and yes, I was one of those individuals who was involved. The outcome although heart -breaking for me, may well be the best course of action for me and my life and future. I’ve been the fixer in a lot of my relationships, family, friends, professional life. For so long, I would do whatever possible to make sure someone is happy, that everything is okay, but all along forgetting the most important person and that is myself.

After time spent thinking of the situation and reading back to myself that it’s not about me, I was able to let go of all that drama. Everyone hits a rough patch in their lives from time to time, but consistently being negative and never finding happiness in anything, well all I can say is I’ve chosen not to be a part of that! If a person is on a path of self destruction, the only person that can help them is THEM! Yes, we as family and friends can offer support and be caring, but at what point does one draw the line in the sand? The saying goes, if you keep failing at something, the only common denominator is you! Well for this particular situation I know where I have drawn my line and its quite clear.

When I took the journey for change in my life last year, I can say that the things I have learned are invaluable and I feel completely whole as a person and have never been happier. I chose how I deal with people and the situations and around me. Although I may slip and fall at times, I always get back up, brush the dirt off my knees and move full force ahead. Being that I like to fix situations, whether that be my bike, stuff around my house, relationships in turmoil, the the most important person you can care for is you. Once you are able to do that, than everything else falls into line. This I can say has and continues to happen for me.

I am completely grateful for my journey and when I look back, I can say that my journey has been quite amazing in so many ways. I smile daily.

I’ve embarked on a new journey and I can say with a whole heart, that NO, it’s not broken. My blogging  in many ways is therapeutic and I continue to receive many amazing compliments as to my blog. As to each one Thank You!

This Saturday is my mother’s birthday and I want to take this moment to tell her that I love you mother and thank you for giving me life. I hope your day is relaxing and wonderful!

True to form, no blog of my is complete without leaving you all a song. I don’t believe I have yet to share one of my favorite bands, so enjoy and have a wonderful weekend and remember you are precious, yes you!

Way overdue posting!

Yes, I am way overdue on my writings for my blog. I have pretty much put it to the side the last month or so. But, all for good reason.

As most of you know I took a new job that started in February and wow is all I can say. Yes, I am working from home, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been any busier with work. I’ve learned a couple of things since working from home. Yes, I can crawl out of bed and take a few steps into my office within 5 mins, but I learned that having a routine is best suited for me. I need to get up, make breakfast, turn the computer on and get my mind prepared for my day.

Second item I have taken away, is I love working from home, no girl drama, the kind of drama where you are left wondering if you are back in highschool again. No jealousy, no stepping on anyone’s toes, well maybe my own, no politics. Just days looking out my office window (my living room window), thinking to myself, why did I ever sign up for any of that? Corporate American I can officially say I don't miss you. I like working for small business.

I am very grateful to be working for the company that I am. Being the only girl with a few good men is much more my style. No drama and no my feelings don’t get hurt if they offer up suggestions, ideas on improvement. I can actually say the only stressful part of my job is when the phone rings and its 4 calls at once. Everyone helps each other out and the meaning of team has really come full circle with this new job. I am very happy that this journey that I was lead upon has taken the path that it did.

So onward and upward is my new motto. With this new path of employment, I've find myself with the ability to travel a bit too.

I remember I made a statement at the beginning of the year, that I needed to get to the beach. Well, that statement has become a reality for me. A friend asked me if I wanted to join him in Puerto Rico for few days and well, I would be quite crazy to say no to that offer. So, I leave tomorrow for a much awaited trip to a tropical paradise. I am so excited I can hardly stand myself! Then I come home for yes, 8 hours and make my way back to DIA for a 3-day trip to St. George for a work conference.

Once I get back, I will be putting many hours in on the bike, my first race is the 20th of April, I’m confident I will be ready, but, I will need to put in some hard time on the bike. I’ve been keeping to my running schedule since darkness falls early during the week and I still work 8-5 job. I’ve been running before work or after, so I know my fitness by April will be where I want it to be. Once I get home from my work trip. It’s all bike! Yes, I am writing this to myself, this is my promise to self. Plus, I will have me day light time now.

I can say I have learned a lot from training in the past year. For me, I learned that running is my core training. It keeps me strong for the bike season, I can pedal faster and longer. I see my team mates putting in long long hours on the bike now and I have to give them mad props, I know myself too well, to know that by June I would be burnt out. Also, racing for me has to be fun, no bueno if no fun. I will always enjoy a beer after a race, ride, etc It’s all about having a great time for me.

So as I look back on the last 3, 6 or 12 months, my life has brought many great changes, the journey has been rewarding even though I had days where I question that reward. I am looking forward to a 5-day trip to Puerto Rico and yes I will be working 3 of those 5 days, but the idea I can work and feel the ocean breeze upon my skin sounds quite amazing.

So farewell and until next week....

As usual I have chosen a song, this is quite fitting for my little adventure away.

Much love all!